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PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2012 12:23 pm 
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(I actually post each of these topics on my blog, but nobody reads it I think so I figured I would just post em here as well, since you fuckers actually respond haha)

Before I begin my “topic of the day” I want to tell a funny story. It ties into this, so bear with me.

So anyone who has read any of my recent posts would have seen the picture of me and the NESkimos from Nerdapalooza. I saved a copy of that image and put it in my “backgrounds” folder on my PC, as I have my PC set to change my desktop every 3 minutes. Its for us ADHD people haha.

On Saturday night, my wife looks over and sees that image, sees Bruce, and instantly goes “I know him!”. I of course look at her like she is nuts. How could she know Bruce? As far as I knew, he lived in St Augustine (although Wily had told me that he and one other band member lived in Orlando and the other 2 were in St Augustine). She prodded me to message him, asking if he had worked at the job she has now, a certain call center. Well, the only way to message him that I knew of was to try to find him on Facebook.

So I found him. It was surprisingly easy despite not knowing his last name (scarily easy in fact…)

From there, I had the quandary of messaging him. To do this I needed a Facebook account. I had deleted my old one months ago, and really had no desire to sign back up. But to appease my wife I did.

I messaged him and then we began looking through his friends list and lo and behold we saw someone we both knew. My old QA Manager (and my wifes current one) by the name of Eric. Holy shit, my wife HAD known Bruce!

Sure enough, he confirmed it later. Shows how small the world is really. And to top it off? He remembered her!

So how does this tie into my topic? Well, after I joined, I suddenly had the urge to start testing out how people would react to a facebook friends request from someone they either did not know, or had met maybe once. The best test subjects?

Why the members of the bands I had met at Nerdapalooza of course! So I started sending friend requests out to people like Dylan, Wily, Bruce, and a few others. And lo and behold each and every one of them accepted my request. This began a series of thoughts in my head to what a friend request really meant, as well as what a Facebook Friend means to some people. Including myself.

For me, I guess a facebook friend is either A) Someone I want to keep track of, or B) an actual person I consider a friend.

However, there is a sort of social pressure to accepting facebook friends as well. Or even friend people at the behest of others. A perfect example is this: There are 2 people who were suggested to me by others to add to my friends list. I sent a request to both, and both accepted. At the same time, however, I HAVE NO EARTHLY CLUE WHO THOSE PEOPLE ARE?! I have never met them (I think) and have only briefly heard their names like twice, maybe.

Why did I friend them?

I honestly have no idea. Was it because people I had friended already suggest them, and I did not wish to insult THOSE people? Perhaps. Or maybe it was a thought that I should possibly get to know THOSE people as they were considered worthy by the others? Who knows.

And why did all those people accept my request? In most cases I had met the people a grand total of once (and in a specific case I have never met the person at all and yet have spoken to them on numerous occasions now). Do they consider me as a friend? Or am I just someone they want to keep tabs on? Perhaps they did not want to seem “douchy” and ignore the request, and just did it out of pity? Again, if it was someone I truly knew I could come to a conclusion (obviously if I know them in person they would have accepted me BECAUSE we are already friends).

For example: Bruce Wily and Dylan. All members of the NESkimos. All three accepted my friend request. I don’t consider them friends YET, as I have met each of them once or twice, have spoken to them a grand total of maybe 45 minutes to each, and barely know anything about them beyond their music. And I would assume they feel the same. But why friend me?

In Bruce’s case I found that he had posted that picture (the one with me, dan and them) to his wall, and one of my old supervisors had actually recognized me. When she asked him if “That was Clay” he couldn’t say yes or no, only that I was cool. He had forgotten my name, which is understandable as he had spoken to me twice that whole weekend, and he was drinking.

Its like there are these new social norms in regards to these networking sites. A coworker found my new facebook account for example, and I accepted his request. I happen to like the guy but even if I had not, I think I would have to accept it for fear of trying to explain WHY I ignored it, causing a huge issue in real life!

Layers within Layers!

It goes even further now. Some jobs require you to give them your Facebook password, some require you to friend them or they refuse to hire you. Its fascinating. And now its considered weird to NOT have a Facebook. My wife doesn’t have one and people are baffled as to why. She simply prefers to stay private with her dealings and does not see a point. I agree with her choice and am fine with it. Its like when I tell people I don’t watch TV anymore and have not for years. It amazes them.

Now, another thing I have questions about is what to DO with a Facebook! Beyond using it to keep track of others, what good is it? To a guy like me, who doesn’t take pictures of himself (I am WAYYYY too ugly for that!) and doesn’t have an interesting life, what good is it? I mean, for a business or a band or a celebrity I can see a use: it helps to keep track of fans and promote your company. Its why I made one in the first place honestly, to keep track of the bands I like (since having your own website that you keep up to date is soooo 2000)

Next, lets talk Twitter. Again I have to question its use. I have one, but its primarily for promoting my work. I have no idea why people follow me as they NEVER SAY A WORD TO ME and just silently follow. Its kinda creepy 0_o

And now, I have just been informed of a new “mobile social networking company” called Solavei which apparently pays you when you get people to join it! DO WE REALLY NEED ANOTHER ONE?! And when I say just heard about it, I mean literally as I was writing this at 12:18pm I got an email from a coworker wanting my personal email so she could send me a link ALL about it.

In the end I am curious as to what these social networking sites mean to YOU. Why do you friend people on Facebook? Why do you accept friend requests from people you may not know or barely know? Why did you even create one to begin with?

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2012 1:00 pm 
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facebook made an enormous douche ridiculously wealthy via advertising and selling personal information.
then he sold the site to Fox whom retain ownership of every image posted on the site.

do i really need to say more?

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2012 1:12 pm 
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Twitter, i mainly use to promote stuff, though i follow a lot of entertaining people and like the occasional discussions that get going. 140 characters means you have to be far more clever to make your point at times.

Facebook, i mainly use to keep in touch with friends and family. Its pretty cut and dry.

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2012 1:25 pm 
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I dislike the way most social networks are managed (although Tumblr's staff seems pretty chill for the most part) but do acknowledge that things like Facebook provide a very useful service to me. It would be much more difficult to arrange a lot of the activities I do without the presence of something like Facebook, so I can't say "Fuck this invasion of privacy, take it down!", but I do think something should be done about the privacy issues Facebook presents.

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2012 1:43 pm 
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I originally joined Facebook only because of this forum, for serious. Look in our facebook thread and you'll see (I even got shit from my best friend because I never told him I was on facebook until like a month or two later).

It was cool to peel away the username and avatars and to switch it up with real pics and names. After awhile real life set in and I added real life peoples (and around this time I was more active on myspace (which I only joined because of forums again... that and a few coworkers wanted to add me); posting on random mess of garbage (bulletin) every day on a whim, mainly to release some of the excess crazy I had boiling up).

It was a little awkward when my Real Life friends outnumbered my Internet Friends haha but whatever I kept in touch with a few people. I eventually started posting randomess on facebook and for some reason all my real life friends loved it so I focused on FB (around that time Myspace had more or less died). I only added people I knew personally and felt weird when someone who I didn't know added me (I usually ignored them).

I became a club promoter not too long after that and was pretty much forced to accept every request that came my way because I could damage my group's rep by ignoring their clientele. At first I was able to remember everyone's life story, their birthday, their favorite color, even random mannerisms they may have had. At one point I was meeting so many people that even if we danced, I would forget them if I had no romantic interest in them (that was actually kinda scary, "Hey Patrick remember me? We danced all night last week at [douchey club here]? How are you?" hashsignAwkwardMoments"). I dunno I kinda felt like the whole club scene killed a lot of good I had in me because of the whole not being able to remember people thing (I rarely cared about other people too, I'd get them in free if they asked but I never really went above and beyond like I used to).

I got out of it last year and don't accept people I don't know anymore... I'm kinda glad that's all over with, but I miss it at the same time hahaha. I'm considering going back in, especially to make some change on the side since I'm cutting hours for school and could use the extra money if I pull in crazy amounts of college kids every week.

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Nameless88 wrote:
Also, really hope the soundtrack CD for the movie is the stuff from the actual movie, because this might be the first soundtrack I've actually bought from a movie since like...fucking Pokemon The First Movie. Yeah, I bought it, I was like 12 when it came out, big whoop, wanna fight about it?


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2012 2:20 pm 
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I had a Facebooks, originally just to keep in touch with friends, but one day I thought fuck it, I think FB is dumb and I don't want one, if my friends are truly good friends, they'll keep in touch with me for once, as I pointed out to them, I'm hardly difficult to reach being on Steam, MSN or Gchat whenever I'm awake.
To me, these kind of things just seem like spam, ocassionally a good story or link will come along but it slowly gets drowned out by all the other shit.

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2012 2:39 pm 
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Neon Jackal wrote:
I had a Facebooks, originally just to keep in touch with friends, but one day I thought fuck it, I think FB is dumb and I don't want one, if my friends are truly good friends, they'll keep in touch with me for once, as I pointed out to them, I'm hardly difficult to reach being on Steam, MSN or Gchat whenever I'm awake.
To me, these kind of things just seem like spam, ocassionally a good story or link will come along but it slowly gets drowned out by all the other shit.


I thought the same thing. Sure was an eye-opener when I closed it. These people had my phone number and email address.

Dead silence after that.

That was when I began to realize that maybe I set the bar to low for the word "friend."

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2012 3:03 pm 
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A real friend is someone who only calls you when they need something hahaha.

But for real most people sit around waiting for someone to call them, when they can do the reaching out themselves... It's when the other individual fails to respond, when you should question their friendship.

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Nameless88 wrote:
Also, really hope the soundtrack CD for the movie is the stuff from the actual movie, because this might be the first soundtrack I've actually bought from a movie since like...fucking Pokemon The First Movie. Yeah, I bought it, I was like 12 when it came out, big whoop, wanna fight about it?


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2012 3:08 pm 
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Blackman! wrote:
A real friend is someone who only calls you when they need something hahaha.

But for real most people sit around waiting for someone to call them, when they can do the reaching out themselves... It's when the other individual fails to respond, when you should question their friendship.


I understand that point, though a couple of factors made this a little more complicated than that, lol.

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2012 3:14 pm 
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Well after deleting my account, the couple of friends I had who also had steam just figured now we'd actually have things to talk about since I don't see every status update now.
I've had one friend reach out, find my number and call me and got one to sign into msn more often, anyone else has just confirmed my original thoughts, that they don't care enough to put in the effort(which is very, very little) to keep in regular contact. Hell, not even an e-mail haha.

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2012 3:47 pm 
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Facebook:

I was big into Facebook. I joined it in 2004, when you could only get in with a .edu email address.

No such thing as a news feed back then, and you couldn't see shit without an account. It was really "network" oriented - my ufl.edu address placed me in the UF network, and I could see everything on people's profiles who were also on the UF network. If they were out-of-network (another school), you couldn't see anything until they accepted your friend request.

No photo-sharing (you just had your profile picture, and there wasn't a history of it or anything - when you uploaded a new one, the old one was gone), video-sharing, tagging people, location-tagging, apps, games, none of it. You could message people. I'm not even sure if posting on somebody's wall existed at that point, I wanna say that came later. There was an amazing feature where you could post your class schedule, find people in the same section as you, and message them about a missed lecture or whatever. Facebook was god-damned useful back then.

And it was fun! My favorite feature was groups - I don't think there was such thing as global group, it was limited to your network. And you could invite people in, assign titles, it was awesome. I remember somebody made a Captain Planet group, and I got the title of "Captain Pollution." When walls showed up, we'd post giant ASCII dicks all over the place. I'm talking the biggest dicks, guys.

I watched as new things started coming in - I remember when the news feed was a big deal, a lot of protest groups sprang up. They eventually made it so you didn't have to generate news items.

When they opened it up to the outside world, I remember being pretty excited - now my other friends can join! Facebook was the classy version of MySpace, since you couldn't post giant sparkly animated gifs all over the place.

But overtime, it's just gone further and further downhill. My parents are on it. Shit, my grandma's on it. The privacy is virtually gone - it was a pain in the ass to keep my Facebook locked down to the 2004-era privacy levels I was accustomed to. It seemed like every few months, some new feature would come in, I'd have to go lock it down/block it. My cousin added me, I rejected it, and his mom called me up wondering why I didn't accept his friend request. I explained, y'know, I post a decent amount of horrible shit on there, he shouldn't see any of it, I don't think.

We're at the point now where people say "Oh, don't post things you don't want employers seeing on Facebook!" I mean, there's photos I was posting there in 2005/2006, drunk at parties, when this whole business of "watch out for future employers!" just... didn't exist. There were photos when my friends and I got drunk and shaved my back!

And I found myself getting dragged into all sorts of stupid horseshit. Getting in really heated arguments with people I didn't even like and revealing way too much about my own personal shit/problems. Being concerned not just about what I post on there, but what other people post about me. I'd spend a LOT of nights looking at other people's facebooks, and being sad that, y'know, "I wonder what so-and-so is doing now oh that looks interesting" etc. Looking up ex-girlfriends, seeing what they're doing. Stuff like that.

Now, yeah, sure, you can go through the process of putting people into groups, controlling who can see what, etc.

I quit Facebook last month. I got all my things in order, made sure I had the various phone numbers I wanted, used that "download all your data as a ZIP file", and deleted my account. Not the normal "deactivate" - all my data is gone from Facebook. Pictures, posts, tags, everything.

Since then, my overall level of social activity has gone *up.* I find myself actually engaging with people. I call people up to do things, and they show up. I've been spending higher amounts of real, quality time with friends around me.

And even better, I control who knows things about me. I have privacy again. When I'm upset about something, instead of writing stupid, horrible shit on Facebook, I call somebody, or I just, y'know, deal with it, on my own, in private.

People that only contacted me on Facebook? Don't particularly miss them.

Photos? I post photos to my flickr now. And they're only photos I don't mind sharing with the entire internet, and I only post ones that I think are interesting/funny on their own accord. Frankly, I'm not super-interested in most photos people take on Facebook. Oh, you applied a filter to a shitty picture of a can of diet coke while at your favorite taco shop? That's super interesting.

Part of me kinda misses facebook-stalking people, but I'll probably get over that.

To sum it up: Facebook used to be about connecting with other people. Now, it's mostly a way to show everybody what you're doing all day. I don't like the current Facebook.

Twitter: I like twitter, because I can't post THAT much in a tweet - maybe a picture of something I find funny. Or a funny quip about something. I can't go on diatribes, I can kinda/sorta tag people, and they can tag me, but it's not quite like how it is on Facebook.

Plus, I don't really interact with a lot of real-life friends on twitter. I mostly follow comedians I like, comic artists, things like that. I like it.

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2012 4:03 pm 
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everyone is wrapped up in their own personal hell, I understand the want and need to have people reach out to you, but if you're pointing fingers remember that there's three pointing right back at you.

The people who have nothing to talk about due to constant status updates are usually pretty boring. I can post a status every day and any day of the week I'll be able to talk about anything as long as people aren't trying to troll. (Sidenote: I try to limit it to one/day, photos and links don't count. I try to minimize my postings so that I'm not one of those people that post forty things in one hour... that shit's annoying). But Either way, not being able to talk because you post a lot is a weak excuse.

People will reach out to you if you were active on random social networks and then stop, but that doesn't last for too long after. Again, if you want more real life interaction with your friends, you're gonna have to make the first move.

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Nameless88 wrote:
Also, really hope the soundtrack CD for the movie is the stuff from the actual movie, because this might be the first soundtrack I've actually bought from a movie since like...fucking Pokemon The First Movie. Yeah, I bought it, I was like 12 when it came out, big whoop, wanna fight about it?


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 14, 2012 12:41 am 
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ITT: social networking is a cheap facsimile for social interaction.

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PostPosted: Tue Aug 14, 2012 7:36 am 
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twitter: random stuff and self-promotions

facebook: random stuff and self promotions. Also most people who set up group activities do so easily on facebook to do things. Smaller groups of friends just make plans in person.

Multiple reasons. In the end, shameless self-promotion though.

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PostPosted: Wed Aug 15, 2012 7:55 pm 
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i liek peopel

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Do you mind? He's on official trolling business. Very important. :redv:


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PostPosted: Thu Aug 16, 2012 5:55 pm 
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Fallout wrote:
i liek peopel


Napalm Man likes this.

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PostPosted: Thu Aug 16, 2012 10:23 pm 
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Napalm Man wrote:
Fallout wrote:
i liek mudkipz


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